I Have Nothing to Say

Okay, I have nothing to say.  It'll probably take me about 2500 words to say nothing, being as I am quite loquacious when writing and what can be said in three words usually takes me ten, but I'm still going to say nothing. 

If you want to read about nothing, continue on.  If not, I suggest you stop here.  It's been a LONG time since I updated my journal, and I have a lot of nothing to say….uh, if that makes sense…

I HAVE NOTHING TO SAY ABOUT:

Broken pencils when you're trying to draw a picture.  It's really quite pointless. 

President Obama going on a week-long trip to Africa, where he will promote freedom, democracy, and economic opportunity. I guess he figured it hasn't worked here — so try it somewhere else.

The old saying "A word to the wise."   A word to the wise isn't necessary – it's the stupid ones that need the advice….

Any of the "Lethal Weapon" movies.  Mel Gibson is an unbalanced hothead who could explode at any moment.  I don't recall what he played in the movie..

About my neurologist who has a very holistic approach to my multiple sclerosis.  He said "no more red meat, no more salt, no more alcohol."  I asked "how about sex?"  He replied, "I'm seeing someone…"

The old adage, "early to bed, early to rise."  I think that makes your neighbors suspicious….

People who are brave enough to have plastic surgery by a surgeon whose office is filled with artwork by Picasso.

Animal Testing.  I think it's a terrible idea.  It's cruel, and inhumane, and just plain horrible.  The poor animals get all nervous and give the wrong answers….

The ideal man.  He doesn't smoke, doesn't drink, doesn't do drugs, doesn't swear, or get angry.  He also doesn't exist. 

The supreme courting ruling that same sex marriages are legally valid when recognized in states which wish to do so. If you really don't want gay people to get married, you shouldn't ban gay marriage. You should ban gay divorce.

And the LAST thing I don't want to talk about is my favorite joke:

Three southern belles were sitting on the front porch in Georgia, talking and fanning themselves in the heat.  One of the ladies had just come back from a trip to New York and was telling the others "Ladies?  Did you know, that in New Yawk, there ah men who sleep with other men?"

"Lawd no, honey" one of them replied.  "What do you call them?"

"Well" she said, "You call them homosexxxxxxxxuallllls,"   fanning herself very quickly. 

She continues, and says "Did you know, that in New Yawk, there ah women who sleep with other women??" 

"Lawd no, honey" another lady replies.  "What do you call THEM?"

"Well," she says, fanning herself furiously, "You call them lesssssbiaaans."

Shocked, the other women just rock in their rocking chairs fanning themselves and staring at the other woman.

She continues, and says "Did you know, that in New Yawk, there ah men who will put their mouths on a woman's priiiiiiiiiivate parts?" 

Blushing furiously, the other two ladies fan themselves even more quickly and state "Lawd no, honey.  What do you call THEM??"

Pulling herself up straight in her chair, and taking a deep breath, the southern belle looks at her friends and replies  "Well, when ah caught mah breath, ah called him Sugar."

Well that's all I had nothing to say about.  I told you I couldn't say nothing in a few words.  lol 

Perhaps my next journal will be about SOMETHING important.  I wouldn't hold my breath though…..